Just so you know I'm not dead

Apparently I discovered a new type of migraine for myself tonight and it scared me and my mom enough (it seemed like a mini seizure and so forth) that I started to hyperventilate and lost my ability to control my body and so forth. We went to the hospital and sat around for a while and then got checked out. They gave me a shot of some heavy duty migraine medicine that made me feel high and again I kinda lost control of my motor abilities and got very hot. When I stopped reacting they get me perkaset - which I'm currently on so pardon if this doesn't make much sense - and sent me home with specific instructions to see my doctor soon. I still have the migraine, but it's not as bad anymore; all these drugs have taken the edge off enough that I can sleep.

Thanks guys.

Night.


~Evy



No quote tonight guys. Sorry. My brain doesn't work.

It's all a gray area

How much of religion is just people wanting to believe in something? How much of it is people grasping at straws? How much of it is people wanting to have something that helps them explain things they don't understand? How much of it is people looking for an excuse or a way out? How much of it is people blindly believing what they are told? How much of it is children doing as their parents did?




These questions are not me questioning my beliefs. It's true, I haven't quite worked out in my head what I believe in, but I know what I don't. I know that I don't like the idea of most organized religion. I don't like being told I have to believe exactly that doctorine or I am wrong. I don't like how so many religions label things as 'evil' - drinking, smoking, doing some drugs, premarital sex, homosexuality, etc.

I have faith in something - some one or thing or multiple for that matter - but I can't put into words what it is yet, and I'm not really sure I want to. When you start putting down your beliefs they become a target for other people to find how you aren't adhering to them.

Anyways, I guess I was just noticing things again and I wanted to write down what I was thinking.


~Evy




"So everything that doesn't fit into some stupid idea of what you think God wants, you just try to hide or fix or get rid of? It's just all too much to live up to. No one fits in one hundred percent of the time . . . Why would god make us all so different if he wanted us to be the same?" ~ Mary (Jena Malone), Saved!